At times in my life, meditation has been too difficult, because it would bring up ugly stuff floating around in my mind that was too difficult to look at. I have been pretty good at processing events and such that I feel guilty about (guilt for me is the number one cringey issue that makes my brain want to run away) and moving those feelings through with the experience/release process that I learned in a book I can't even remember what that book was called*, but it was both boring and helpful at the same time.
*Update 3/23/2018 I looked up the book. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1963638.The_Untethered_Soul
After reading some of the book Writing Down the Bones I learned that some of us do better with writing meditations. So I wrote -- over and over - om laghu bhavram. I found this very helpful, and I worked on trying to think about the meaning of om (I'm) laghu (lightness) and bhavram (itself) without translating it in English through my brain each time. I'm not quite there yet, but I know that if I can connect the words with the images in my mind I won't have to take that extra step.
I did find this first experience heartening and far more enlightening than I imagined. I certainly feel down, slow, and heavy today in part because of the last few months and how difficult they have been, yesterday's burden, and the tapering of prednisone.
I've been too beat up by life lately to be particularly hopeful, but I will freely admit to enjoying the experience.
What I absolutely love is the first centering thought:
"My struggle has ended. I am in harmony with myself."
Sounds like kind of a death, right? That's not the death I've been experiencing.