Tranquility. Beautiful word. Worth a second post.
I have been reconnecting with old friends (and old superintendents and supervisors) from my public school teaching days. With all of the difficulties brought by the NCLB Act and it's flawed understanding of children like my own, I still loved teaching. I remember that alarm going off in the dark and being miserable (I'm not a morning person), and then walking through the door to the school and being so happy to be there. Call me crazy, but spending my days with eighth graders was a joy for me (all except that last week in June when some of them turned from sweet Mr. Jekylls into terrifying Mr. Hydes).
So, being that I am so homesick for my old job, I am lately visiting it every night in my dreams. I have lost count at this point of how many times I have been "back there" in the last few weeks. As in most dreams, there is something not quite right. One time, I had to teach in the hallway with me in the corner and desks lined up at a 90 degree angle. Another time, I only had 30 minutes to make the 45 minute commute. I was trying to figure out if I could speed fast enough to make up the time. The last thing I wanted to do was disappoint Jim (my principal) by being late.
In every single dream so far, the issue of the front office comes up. I always fail to sign in. At some point, I realize that I have been working for days on end without ever signing in. In the most recent dream, Jim finally seeks me out to tell me that I have to sign in.
A friend of mine tells me that these recurring dreams have a deep meaning -- that my psyche is trying to tell me something. I think it's trying to tell me that I need to teach. In spite of all these lovely offers I've been getting thanks to Monster (Aflac, Omaha Insurance, & Weichert Realtors to name a few) I am a teacher. I might be able to make $80,000 a year selling caskets (yes, I was looking into a casket sales position) but "IyamwhatIyam" and that's a teacher. So I'll keep plugging away until I find my way back where I belong.
And I'm going to take my friend's advice and sign a piece of paper before I go to bed tonight -- thereby "signing in" again and officially admitting that I am a career teacher who belongs -- officially belongs -- in a public school. Maybe tonight I will just enjoy teaching without worrying about that front office.
Hopefully, I'll start getting a paycheck from the astral world for all this work.
Update: As ridiculous as I felt doing it, I "signed in" (I have a counter in my kitchen which is high and very similar to the office counter where we used to sign in) and it worked at least for last night. I slept! No teaching.
So, being that I am so homesick for my old job, I am lately visiting it every night in my dreams. I have lost count at this point of how many times I have been "back there" in the last few weeks. As in most dreams, there is something not quite right. One time, I had to teach in the hallway with me in the corner and desks lined up at a 90 degree angle. Another time, I only had 30 minutes to make the 45 minute commute. I was trying to figure out if I could speed fast enough to make up the time. The last thing I wanted to do was disappoint Jim (my principal) by being late.
In every single dream so far, the issue of the front office comes up. I always fail to sign in. At some point, I realize that I have been working for days on end without ever signing in. In the most recent dream, Jim finally seeks me out to tell me that I have to sign in.
A friend of mine tells me that these recurring dreams have a deep meaning -- that my psyche is trying to tell me something. I think it's trying to tell me that I need to teach. In spite of all these lovely offers I've been getting thanks to Monster (Aflac, Omaha Insurance, & Weichert Realtors to name a few) I am a teacher. I might be able to make $80,000 a year selling caskets (yes, I was looking into a casket sales position) but "IyamwhatIyam" and that's a teacher. So I'll keep plugging away until I find my way back where I belong.
And I'm going to take my friend's advice and sign a piece of paper before I go to bed tonight -- thereby "signing in" again and officially admitting that I am a career teacher who belongs -- officially belongs -- in a public school. Maybe tonight I will just enjoy teaching without worrying about that front office.
Hopefully, I'll start getting a paycheck from the astral world for all this work.
Update: As ridiculous as I felt doing it, I "signed in" (I have a counter in my kitchen which is high and very similar to the office counter where we used to sign in) and it worked at least for last night. I slept! No teaching.
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